Fight like a girl

I fight like a girl who refuses to be a victim.

I fight like a girl who is tired of being IGNORED and HUMORED and BEATEN and RAPED.

I fight like a girl who is sick of not being taken seriously.

I fight like a girl who has been pushed too far.

I fight like a girl who offers and demands respect.

I fight like a girl who has a lifetime of ANGER and STRENGTH and PRIDE pent up in my girly body.

I fight like a girl who does not believe in FEAR and SUBMISSION.

I fight like a girl who knows that THIS BODY and THIS MIND are mine.

I fight like a girl who knows that YOU only have as much power as I grant you.

I fight like a girl who will never allow you to take more than i offer.

I fight like a girl who fights back.

So the next time you think you can distract yourself from your own insecurities by victimizing a girl, THINK AGAIN. SHE MAY BE ME.

AND I FIGHT LIKE A GIRL.

The Shower

we like to shower afterwards
(I like the water hotter than she)
and her face is always soft and peaceful
and she'll watch me first
spread the soap over my balls
lift the balls
squeeze them,
then wash the cock:
"hey, this thing is still hard!"
then get all the hair down there,-
the belly, the back, the neck, the legs,
I grin grin grin,
and then I wash her. . .
first the cunt, I
stand behind her, my cock in the cheeks of her ass
I gently soap up the cunt hairs,
wash there with a soothing motion,
I linger perhaps longer than necessary,
then I get the backs of the legs, the ass,
the back, the neck, I turn her, kiss her,
soap up the breasts, get them and the belly, the neck,
the fronts of the legs, the ankles, the feet,
and then the cunt, once more, for luck. . .
another kiss, and she gets out first,
toweling, sometimes singing while I stay in
turn the water on hotter
feeling the good times of love's miracle
I then get out. . .
it is usually mid-afternoon and quiet,
and getting dressed we talk about what else
there might be to do,
but being together solves most of it
for as long as those things stay solved
in the history of women and
man, it's different for each-
for me, it's splendid enough to remember
past the memories of pain and defeat and unhappiness:
when you take it away
do it slowly and easily
make it as if I were dying in my sleep instead of in
my life, amen.

this are my plans tell me yours

got a fast car and the mambo mood

kind of bonnie and clyde meets fear & loathing in vegas
(plus hotter sex minus some of the drugs)

fancy road trippin?

Message from the Alien

Now I've been kinda seven weeks here and I put together a few things, but there are still this answers that i keep on gettin from saudi girls i've met at parties or chat or friend of a friend, and i know this last week i've been kinda worn out coz i had to finish articles, get imput from many saudis before the holydays, so i forgot the question now, but her answers alwayz goes something like "i'd love to but...

wait til after ramadam
you don't know my dad, he's so strict
my brother is visiting from the states, wanna spend some time with him
i have this family gathering today
i made plans to meet da gurls, i never see them! (?)
i can't miss another class (?)
this week i'm so busy with school (??)
i have to teach science to my lil brother (??)
I gave the driver the day off (???)
if we liked eachother we couldn't marry so...(??????)

Ok, some might be rather honest. Others sounded straight from outer space. There's always this extremely friendly feeling around, like it's just today that is not the right day but try again tomorrow, maybe, inshallah...

Dunno. You might enjoy gettin this phone calls, or texting me after a while see if i'm still there, IM me every day to catch up, this is all cool, love that. I know you might be allright with someone else but still give ur self-esteem a boost playing this way. Rather childish, if you ask, but fun.

Maybe you really can't break away from home and telling you this only makes it worst.

But you know what?

I called you coz i thoght it could be sweet if you come over for a movie or sth. Play some amazing recordz. Get high. I called you coz i wanted to start something not just talk about starting sth. Let's someday soon have a past together and maybe even a present.

There's a few thing i wanna do. Real things, nothing like games. I wanna stay home late, watching movies, kissing, dancing, cooking, drinking, making love, talking, touching, falling asleep, dreaming, showering; drive around, remain silent for hours, park anywhere...with you.

Or whatever you want.

And concerts! I want to go to concerts. And parks.

And I just wanted you to tell me "call me when you want". I just wanted you to call me when you wanted.

The real thing.

I just thought i'd let you know.

LOG

Life's such a rollercoaster. It's been a LOT of fun. But for some reason i started to think about leaving the bigtown for a while. When my agent came with a proposal from Riyadh, it sounded just as far away as i wanted.

If i was going to spend some time over here, i'd rather check what ppl here had to say. So I typed saud1 in technorati, skipped a few results, and came accross this article, where i discovered i knew absolutly nothing about this country. Before even starting to shape my own ideas, i would have to check a few other bloggers, so i followed the links and landed in saudijeans. The more i read the more i wanted to know: scholarships abroad and a saud1 woman filmaker, the summary of the novel "Girls of Riyadh", the dotcoms emerging in the gulf. Eventually i took from there to saudiblogs and
checked a few links. I became instantly engaged.

I've been around for a while now, living here and there. But nowhere near the midle east. So when i got here everything was sooo new to me. And it's not like i could meet you guys any day in the pub after work, you know, and talk about life. I dont mean to sound rude, but i wanted to hear some from this ppl in thobs and abayas, this people who are my neighbors but i can't meet. So I added some feeds to my reader, became a regular of some of your blogs.

In this weeks I've read many lucid thoghts, like ubergirl on saudi men stalk1ng, or dotsson on airheads on vacation. I heard pink_ballerina confessing and bissa dreaming. I read HRH tell us of gorgeous saudi girls in Lebannon. And i found a place where I feel less like the alien.

So I dunno you guys, but i see ALOT going on out there. A lot of new ways to do things on the web. And i feel like saying mine too. So i started this place, where nothing is forbidden.

Feel at home.

Carnaval toda la vida

This post is for InevitablyDooMeD, whoever you are, I just want to share with u my point of view, it might help to have someone else's opinion, plz dont take it badly, if it doesn't help you it might help someone else. There's plenty of ppl out there.

I read you're ambitious, motivated, US educated, going up the corporate ladder. It all translates to me as you coming from a burgeous family and having a job that u find interesting and pays well. Does it mean you are succesfull? I think here you are meassuring succes by community standards, same community standards that bring you frustrations, anger and sorrow. It doesn't sound like all your professional success is paying well emotionally, and by this I don't at all mean that u'd better quit your corporate job and stay at home like women should, plz dont. Bear with me.

Your anxiety comes from not embrasing ur present and wishing for some better future when u'll be loved and men don't lie and women are respected, but since all u describe as being the cause of ur problems is out of ur reach, you dont feel able to find the key to make it happen. Of course no one can give u the key, but let me try share with u how I make change happen.

Everything's about the point of view. It's like a composer deciding this piece is in key of E and this one other in key of F. A painter choosing the colors. A writer can tell the story from the pov of someone who's depressed or excited or doomed. To the same discotheque different people wear black and overcoats or pink cowboy boots and silver hair or plain naked with a g-string. Some dance, some stay at the bar and some others stay home watching movie stars in trendy outfits flashing smiles just becoz it's in the script.

Well there's no script for life. Life is a dream you dream every second, life is your work of art and you are the star. You are free to choose the colours, to set the mood, to play with the characters. So try rearranging a few colours and check again your hand you might find a key to all things that bother you, a pretty real key, as real as anything can be. Why becoming aggressive when you can do your best at using that key to open the doors? Why flashing a smile to conform when u can let the smile open its way from the inner you? Why even considering not smiling when u can fully take hold of the present?

Life is now and you don't need a ticket to ride it! Gandhi once said "be the change you want to see in the world". Fight to build the future you want, but start by changing your reality, it's cliché but you can make a world of difference. We have to take full responsability of what we want and do sth about it. Something small. If it's good it'll spread like a virus. Out there there's plenty of ppl just like us.

What we can't say

From Paul Graham’s essential essay:

"Imagine a kind of latter-day Conrad character who has worked for a time as a mercenary in Africa, for a time as a doctor in Nepal, for a time as the manager of a nightclub in Miami. The specifics don't matter-- just someone who has seen a lot. Now imagine comparing what's inside this guy's head with what's inside the head of a well-behaved sixteen year old girl from the suburbs. What does he think that would shock her? He knows the world; she knows, or at least embodies, present taboos. Subtract one from the other, and the result is what we can't say."